Well, hallelujah, it’s the weekend! We survived the first week of school, thanks in large part to having only three days to deal with, and the fact that Maddie hasn’t had any homework. Time for a break! And the weekend definitely means a break.
One wonderful thing about Maddie is she is generally in a good mood. She’s very easy to get along with…unless you ask her to do something she doesn’t feel like doing, like get up or take a shower or do homework. Actually her mood might not change, but there’s a good probability that mine will. So summertime and weekends are simply delightful. I suppose if I were a better mom, I would require her to do more around the house on those days. That would be awesome. She would probably be more disciplined and would have learned how to do things like do laundry, clean a toilet and scoop dog poop by now. But I guess I’m selfish because I don’t let her off the hook for her benefit nearly as much as for my own. I need a day off too.
So, in the spirit of a day off for all of us, and in honor of Maddie’s general cheerfulness, here are two amusing anecdotes:
A few years ago we bought a nice new Samsung washer and dryer. They were the most highly rated appliances in their categories, and our friend had recently bought the same models after a lengthy research project. We thought it was a no-brainer. Well, apparently we had a couple of lemons because time after time I had to call for service. In the first three years I had to resort to using the laundromat many times while awaiting repairs. We live in a small community and I had been hiring a plumber from nearby to help out. You know the term “plumber’s butt”? It’s a real thing, as evidenced by every single one of those guys who showed up and then squatted down to check out the washing machine. On one particular occasion, I was upstairs in the kitchen, Maddie was in her bedroom, and the plumber was just outside her door working. I was walking toward the stairs when I heard it.
“Hey plumber, you should pull your pants up.”
Well, we’ve all been thinking it. She just had the nerve to say it. My eyes widened, my hand flew over my mouth, and I ran in the other direction to let out my explosion of laughter.
This year we went to Kauai for spring break. Somehow after so many years of traveling, we finally figured out that the whole airport experience is a gazillion times easier if you take a taxi there and back. No more shuttle to and from the long-term parking lot! That’s especially important at the end of the trip, when everybody is exhausted from the travel day, it’s probably fairly late, and we just want to get home. One time we returned from a 22-hour travel day only to have forgotten where our car was parked. It was cold and it was late and it was terrible. Never again. So, to get a taxi at the airport, you just go to the appropriate area and some guy directs you to the next available taxi. That is just how it’s done. It takes just a moment or so and you’re off. So we had just arrived from Hawaii, and we were assigned our cab. Our driver helped us load the luggage and then got in the car while we my husband sat in front and the kids and I organized ourselves in the backseat. Maddie was the last one climb in. And then:
“OH MAN! WHAT STINKS?”
“Maddie!” I whisper-yelled,
“No SERIOUSLY! Something stinks! It smells like somebody cut the cheese!”
Well, the only person who had been the cab 10 seconds before was the driver. If somebody had cut the cheese, it had to have been him.
“Maddie you can’t say that!” I whisper-yelled again.
“Oh!” she replied, as if this was news to her.
Then silence. Oh boy, was that an uncomfortable first few minutes. That 35-minute ride could feel like hours. Fortunately we were able to start up a very interesting conversation with the driver, who had a lot of say about Über, and the tension arising from the fart remark eventually dissipated.
That’s all for now. Happy weekend, everyone!
The Year of Living Hopefully 